Teachers: Walking Petri dishes of elementary school diseases.
We have been divorced for 2 years and although it saddens me that my family has been broken apart, I am happy that my ex and I have have managed to be civil enough to make it okay for the kids.One of the many types of men I have always thought would make a great match for me is a nice southern boy, the kind who looks hot in a plaid shirt, plays guitar, and loves his mama more than sweet tea. I saw words like "honest" and "easy-going."Farmers really like to describe themselves as gentlemen, it seems, and though I'm not entirely sure what that means in this day and age, I felt like all of these guys were safe.I can see him now, dirty blond hair gleaming in the sunshine, out in a field chewing on a piece of wheat. Like the fact that they respect women is not just lip service they use to get laid.Comedians: There’s only one star in this show and it ain’t gonna be you, darling. Slow typists: Endless anxiety caused by staring at the ellipses on your i Phone’s messaging app as you await your partner’s response. The self-check-out kiosk at a grocery store: Trying to complete the simplest task together ends up with you looking like a dummy who needs third-party assistance.Smokey the Bear: Shows his lack of responsibility by relinquishing all fire-prevention duties to you, and only you. Leprechauns: You can’t wear green without it turning into a couples-matching thing and ugh, how gross. Clean-shaven dudes: Unlike their bearded counterparts, these men have no place to store food on their faces, thus making them less useful should you find yourselves stranded together in a desert.