Once the man, or his family, had decided on a potential bride, the Khastegāri process would take place.
In modern Iran, this practice is replaced by the courtship of the man and woman and their mutual decision to start the khastegari process.
The woman’s family welcome the party and invite them to sit in the reception room.
At first, members of the bride’s family talk about the virtues of the girl.
Once both parties had established serious intentions for the relationship, the man's family would bring sweets and a larger bouquet and officially ask the question.
In modern day Iran, the Khastegari is a one-time formality.
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For this ceremony, one or more representatives of the man’s family would visit the woman's family.
The first visit could be for the parties to become acquainted.
In modern times important characteristics are the education level and intelligence of the girl, her ability to make the most of the situation when times get tough, and her future prospects.
After hearing about the potential bride, the man's family will discuss his own merits, usually his education and/or career prospects.
Traditionally, modesty was among the most highly valued qualities, along with domestic skills like cooking, embroidery, and entertaining at social gatherings (Mehmān Navāzi).