I kind of think that western women are used to chivalry and being shown a lot of affection, which can make them uncomfortable. ” I think it’s far more likely that it’s just that those are the kind of guys you are attracted to.
To put it mildly, most Thai guys are far more towards the “metro” side than guys you would be used to back home.
The few that inspire western women are the ones working in classic bad boy jobs. I’m more ‘inspired’ though by someone I can actually communicate with though more than if he’s ‘metro’ or ‘bad boy’.
I also don’t know if I buy that whole stereotype of the bad boy appeal…regardless the guys from these jobs are often more likely to be around and speak with Western women than others. From my time spent in Thailand and everyone I came across, my conclusion is that Thailand is a very “closed” country.
I wrote it in Thai then again in English saying that I hoped I had said everything correctly the first time. Whereas in the Western male/Thai female relationships it’s often assumed that the man has more money and is the care taker, maybe it’s more confused with Western female/Thai male. If you enjoyed reading and don’t want to miss a post, please subscribe to my RSS feed Reply I’ve not been to Thailand yet (it’s still on my bucket list) but I love your insight on the whole dating a Thai thing. Regardless, there are still way, way more white men with Thai women.
The guys who work in the bars and the tattoo shops and as musicians, depending on where they’re located, have more interaction with Westerners in general (I hate that label, like we’re an entirely different type of people) and have better English skills. It looks like being a ‘white’ women in this country is not an easy thing! I’ve been in thailand since may 2011 (exactly as long as you have) and know personally eight white women (and one guy) of my age or close to my age some of whom are dating most of whom are married to thai men. Like, I said though, I also still haven’t manage to make any good friends who are Thai, so maybe my social life here as been more limited than I think? Reply I always joked that ‘the good Thai boys are only interested in dating the good Thai girls’ – there is such a strong stigma about dating a Wild Western Woman that most guys seemed to shy away from the idea.
) or reason behind these relationships, it’s apparent to anyone who has landed in the Bangkok airport that there are a whole lotta white guys with Thai women and…zero white women with Thai guys. That’s not normally something you ask someone when you hear they’re in a relationship.
Saving face is a huge deal in Thailand and there’s a fear, like with any foreign language, about speaking English and looking stupid if speaking incorrectly. But I guess there is a thing in common with all the relationships: you never know where and when you will meet the special someone! I lived in CM for almost 3 years and did my fair share of dating – and not *all* of them fell into the bartender/bar owner/tattoo artist/tour guide/musician group! I was in school when I first came, so I dated some students, too – and had the same problem you mentioned about really making friendships beyond a surface-level friendliness.
The Western women are with the bartenders/musicians/tattoo artists because Somehow I managed to cross this invisible cultural barrier and have found myself now helping in a tattoo shop. I’m looking forward to more personal stories on what have you learnt thanks to your bf… I worked with Burma NGOs, and there are far more fahrang woman/burmese(or ethnic) man relationships – most that I knew of were long term, serious relationships, many married.
Fast forward a year and a half, and I’m not getting married or never coming home, but I may or may not have found a certain someone. In fact, he’s someone I mentioned briefly back in a May post on Wanderlust and Lipstick… It’s just that here, we’re not considered European, or Australian, or American, or whatever, but or ‘white foreigner’), the guy is either a musician, a bartender or a tattoo artist. My belief is that these are the few guys who are able, willing and used to talking with Western women. ) don’t have any Thai friends even after living in . ) If it that’s difficult to make friends, how in the world am I supposed have a relationship with someone?
It’s frustrating and hard to understand or explain – I usually feel very welcome here and people are polite. (I once sent a message to a fellow teacher, who was my age and who had spoken to me several times at school, if she would like to get coffee sometime. I don’t know if it’s an intimidation thing, a money thing, a language thing…I’m assuming a combination of all three.
It’s also confusing and uncomfortable to me to be so aware that we’re supposedly so different or a type of novelty couple – I wouldn’t think that way at home, but here it’s kind of in your face!